By Nancy Thorner & Bonnie O'Neil
Most of us appreciate and enjoy cleverly written one-line statements that speak volumes, make a powerful statement, and cause us to smile. That is particularly true when it comes to political statements, especially during a presidential campaign. One of the very best at creating amazing one-liners is Burt Prelutsky.
Burt Prelutsky is a professional California-based writer and a conservative Republican to boot, who is able to churn out three outstanding, witty and attention grabbing essays a week that are available only through subscription service at [email protected].
Many of us who appreciate this writer’s skills are convinced Trump would benefit by Burt’s particular talent. We asked the writer if he might be interested since he had already been writing some great articles favoring “the Donald”, and he expressed interest. Burt could provide the ammunition (witty and clever sound bites) to help Trump counter and unhinge Hillary as she throws the kitchen sink at Trump. You would think that at least a few Republicans would call upon the talents of professional writers — and not just the usual ones who write rather boring, predictable speeches for every candidate who comes along.
Prelutsky is amazed when he meets people who believe Reagan came up with his own material. Reagan's trick was his ability to make it all sound ad-libbed and spontaneous, which, of course, is the trick that every actor has to master to the best of his ability. Likewise, Jack Benny, Bob Hope, Alan King, and Jerry Seinfeld all depended on comedy writers for their best “one liners."
Who is Burt Prelutsky?
Prelutsky has been a humor columnist for the L.A. Times and a movie critic for a Los Angeles magazine. As a freelancer, he has written for the New York Times, Washington Times, TV Guide, Modern Maturity, Emmy, Holiday, American Film, and Sports Illustrated.
For television, he has written for Dragnet, McMillan & Wife, MASH, Mary Tyler Moore, Rhoda, Bob Newhart, Family Ties, Dr. Quinn, and Diagnosis Murder. In addition, he has written a batch of terrific TV movies. View Burt’s IMDB profile.
As an author, Prelutsky has six books to his credit, three of them political commentary: Conservatives Are From Mars, Liberals Are From San Francisco, Liberals: America's Termites, and Barack Obama: Your're Fired. Sixty Seven Conservatives You Should Meet Before You Die, published in 2012, is dedicated to America's conservatives who must, on a daily sometimes hourly basis, stand accused of being heartless, brainless, and cowardly–like Dorthy's companions in Oz. A sampling of the sixty seven conservatives included in Prelutsky's book are Michele Bachmann, member of Congress; Pat Boone, entertainer; Andrew Brietbart, website creator; Tucker Carlson, journalist; Pat Robertson, minister; Phyllis Schlafly, writer/artist; Kellyanne Conway, pollster, now Trump's campaign manager. Burt Prelutsky's published books are noted here.
Two more books by Prelutsky are due out later this year, one based upon a movie he wrote, "Angels on Tap"; the other a memoir which deals with those portions of Burt's life where it intersected with such notables as Groucho Marx, George Burns, Carol Burnett, Fred Astaire, Mae West, Tiny Tim, Phil Spector, etc
Mr. Prelutsky gave us permission to share, In Defense of Trump, which he wrote back in August of this year. It is still timely today and displays Burt's wit and his ability to hit a home run, as does each one of Prelutsky's three weekly articles available per subscription on a yearly basis.
IN DEFENSE OF TRUMP
I don’t entirely agree that the enemy of my enemy is my friend. After all, circumstances dictated that we aligned ourselves with the Soviet Union during WWII, but one can easily see how we might have found ourselves linking up with the equally vile Germany to defeat the Soviet Union.
Having said that, when I consider the various elements that have come together to defeat Donald Trump, I can’t help thinking there might be more to be said for his candidacy than I have previously credited to his account.
For instance, just the other day 50 so-called Republicans claiming to be so-called national security experts signed a letter predicting that Trump would be the worst President in history when it comes to keeping America safe.
Huh?
Let me get this clear. We have a current President and a presidential wannabe who have been instrumental in rolling out the red carpet for Russia in the Middle East; given rise to ISIS, simultaneously making a mockery of the money and lives we had previously sacrificed in Iraq; handed over $1.9 billion to Iran ($400 million of it in the form of an illegal ransom) along with a clear path to a nuclear arsenal; released 166 Islamic terrorists from Gitmo; welcomed thousands of un-vetted Syrians into the homeland in spite of their cohorts having slaughtered hundreds of innocent people in Paris, Brussels, Munich, San Bernardino, Orlando, and Constantinople, during the past year; created space between the United States and Israel — space that hadn’t existed since 1948; and have devoted more time and attention to invalidating the Second Amendment and disarming American patriots than it has to combating world-wide jihadism.
I’m still trying to get my head around the fact that those 50 Republican fruitcakes imagine that Donald Trump could be worse. Naturally, they don’t bother explaining how he would manage to do what strikes me as virtually impossible. Short of detonating a nuclear device in Times Square, what do they imagine Trump could possibly do that would match what the abominable twosome have already done?
Now it seems we have yet another nincompoop vowing to do everything in his power to save us from the unspeakable horrors of a Trump administration. Evan McMullin, a 40-year-old calling himself a Republican who used to have some connection to the CIA, is pretending to run as an Independent. I say “pretending” because anyone entering the race because he hates or fears Donald Trump, knowing he himself has no chance of being elected, is clearly out to help Hillary Clinton get across the finish line.
Mr. McMullin claims he’s an Independent at this point, but in his opening statement declared that Trump is “inhuman and doesn’t care about anyone but himself.” One is left to conclude that McMullin believes, against all existing evidence, that Mrs. Clinton is in fact human and does care about someone other than herself.
In response to a follow-up question, McMullin said that he believed that both Trump and Clinton are unequipped to be the Commander-in-chief. But inasmuch as he surely knows that as an alleged conservative, the only votes he might possibly siphon off are those that would otherwise go to Trump, it’s clear which of the unequipped candidates he would prefer to see inaugurated next January.
Unfortunately, he isn’t the only spoiler in the race. The Loonytarians have two former Republican governors, Gary Johnson and Bill Weld, whose sole reason for running, ego aside, is to grease Hillary Clinton’s slide back into the White House.
I have sought better reasons to vote for Trump aside from his being the last line of defense against a continuation of Obama’s demented policies, and I think these lunkheads have provided it.
Although I certainly prefer Trump’s stated approach to taxes, immigration, trade pacts, the military and the Supreme Court, to anything the Democrats offer, I always worry that Trump might change his mind overnight.
But when I look at the bozos standing shoulder-to-shoulder in opposition to him, I begin to find my doubts vanishing like the morning dew.
In my own case, I have often taken comfort from those who have attacked me over something I’ve written. Often, it’s those who voice their contempt and outrage, even more than those who let me know they’re on my side, who have done the most to convince me that I must be doing something right.
I mean, how bad can someone be if the likes of the Bushes, John Kasich, Ted Cruz [now with Trump], George Will, 50 dopes who think they can predict future calamities — but failed miserably to predict them when that was exactly what they were being paid to do — and some dodo named McMullin who didn’t bother joining the 17 other contenders vying for the GOP nomination when it was actually up for grabs, all agree that you’re the worst thing to come along since unsliced bread?
Even more telling is the fact that these morons have all decided that Hillary Clinton, whose easily-hacked private server might very well be the reason that Dr. Amiri, a nuclear physicist who was spying on behalf of the U.S., was recently executed by Iran, would make a better president.
Hillary Clinton is a woman who is so beholden to the underbelly of black society that she wouldn’t even risk filling out the questionnaire sent her by the national Fraternal Order of Police, lest she risk receiving their endorsement, thus causing consternation to the racists who constitute the membership rolls of the NAACP, the Congressional Black Caucus and the Black Lives Matter movement.
For good measure, Mrs. Clinton is now being sued by survivors of the Benghazi massacre for defamation of character. Apparently she thought she was already the President and could get away with insisting they were lying when they reported that she had blamed the deaths of their loved ones on a video she knew full-well had played no role in the gruesome events of 9/11/12.
Those Never-Trumpers might wish to reconsider their priorities in light of the evidence. Perhaps to salvage their dignity, they might think about declaring themselves Maybe-Trumpers to begin with and then slowly begin calling themselves Probably-Trumpers in September and October, before finally caving in and voting for the far-more deserving candidate in November.
Why are the two of us so “hot” to tout this man’s talents? We believe it is in America’s best interest to elect Donald Trump. Burt has the ability to make complicated issues easily understood, with few but witty words. That appeals to the vast majority of people: short, clever, enjoyable and informative is hard to beat. If Trump doesn’t use his talents, we hope you will subscribe to Burt's articles to be a participant in his outstanding, one-of-the-kind one-liners.